My name is Cassie Song and I am trapped
by DinosaursOnASpaceship
Summary: Cassie Amelia Song spent her childhood running with her mother, but when her mom must return to prison, Cassie finds an adventure all her own. It may even lead to answers she never even thought to ask for.
1. Prologue: When We Ran

**Disclaimer. I do not own Doctor Who, River Song, or The Doctor. I wish I did. This may eventually be considered irrelevant fiction, especially since I descided to upload this less than a week before "The Wedding of River Song". Oh well. Enjoy it while it lasts!**

Prologue:

My mother always told me I was born in prison. Not just any prison: Stormcage, ranked number one in high security. Though I was no prisoner, merely a gurgling baby, mum was. So when they took me away, she broke out, stole me back, and we ran. We ran for a very long time.

It was me and her versus the universe. We ran through the stars, never staying anywhere for long. We spent seven months in the Ood Sphere with the ancient, prophecy telling ood. A month on the diamond planet of Midnight. Nearly a year on Earth exploring tombs and deserts. It was amazing and inspiring and terrifying. My first word was run. An average person (scoff) would think my childhood was lonely, but I had my mother.

And my fairy tales.

I learned to read when I was two and stuck in a very cold dungeon with my mother and just enough light to read. However, I was being read to since I was born and it continued even after I could read quite well. We couldn't take much with us on our travels. We would gain possessions and lose them just as quickly, but that deep blue book of stories was always there. A constant in my ever changing childhood. Each story was about a man. Or was he a magician? Or was he a god? He was called the Doctor. He, like my mother and I, travelled the universe. He visited planets and species and went on many adventures. Unlike us, though, his adventures usually led to him saving the world. The universe, people. He also travelled in a blue box. Mum and I had a watch.

The actual book itself was amazing. It was leather bound, the color of a deep blue sky and contained beautifully drawn illustrations. In some stories the Doctor's appearance changed. It was as if the illustrator got tired of drawing the same man so he (or she) just drew another one. But it was always the same man. The Doctor. He captivated my mind. I dreamed about going on adventures with him. He was my best friend growing up and he was a story.

It was after my mother finished reading me one of the Doctor's stories (The Doctor and his current "companion" go to Pompeii the day before Mt. Visuvias erupts and the Doctor ends up being the cause of it). I had officially become ten earlier that day. She put the book down on the dirt floor of our current residence: A tepee. I yawned, curling up in the sleeping bag.

"Cassie. It's time for me to stop running all the time".

"What do you mean?"

"I made a promise a very long time ago that I need to live up to. I've been running from that for ten years now."

"Are you leaving me behind?" The exhaustion I had felt only moments before had disappeared and was now replaced by fear. Not the kind of fear I felt when I saw a Dalek for the first time. Not like the fear of mum and I being trapped in a tomb for 37 hours. It was a completely new fear. Abandonment.

"It's complicated sweetie."

"It is always complicated isn't it. When I asked you why I didn't have a father, you said it was complicated. When I asked you what you had done to get in prison, you said it was complicated. I'm sick of complicated!" I could feel tears in my eyes, but with all my strength I blinked them back. "What are you going to do with me?"

Mum very rarely showed much signs of weakness. Usually she was clever and charismatic and so, so strong. Laughing at danger. But when she answered me her voice was thick and broken.

"Well, first of all, I'm not doing anything to you. And second, we are going to move into a proper house on Earth, together."

"Wait, so this means you aren't leaving me?"

"It means I'm not leaving you yet."

She lied.

We set off the next day, saying goodbye to the natives of Onerai, second planet in the Evelen galaxy. I held on to my mum's hand as I had done so many times before. She typed the coordinates in that ancient Vortex Manipulator on her wrist, pushed a button, and we were gone.

There we stood, in a small suburbia, directly in front of a tiny grey house that looked dreadfully dull after seeing the wonders of the universe.

"This is it?" I looked at that house like it was a sick adipose. I had absolutely no desire to go any closer.

"I thought it was quaint," Mum's voice held no hint of sarcasm, but her eyes gave off a completely different vibe. The mischief in her would scare some, but it gave me sudden excitement.

I walked up to the door. It looked so average, so human, so everything my life till then had been against. I turned the key, feeling the thud of the lock in every bone of my body. Upon opening the door, I stood, shocked into silence. It was bigger on the inside. Dazed, I ran into the huge entrance hall, that alone was the size of all the other houses on this small, Earth block. Hallway after hallway. Room after room. A person could spend a lifetime exploring it. Suddenly, I was very excited for the adventures mum and I would have in this house.

"Cassie!" Mum's voice echoed through the halls. I ran down the passages, finding my way back to the entrance hall. There she stood. My mother. I went to her.

"This place, it's amazing!" I beamed at her, but something was off.

"I have to leave now." The words, so out of nowhere, so unexpected, caught me off guard.

"NO! You said we would live here! We! How – How are we going to live here if you leave? I don't want it! Any of it! Take the house! If you leave because of it, I never want to see it again!" I could feel myself on the floor, but wasn't quite sure how I got there. The tears pouring from my eyes made my face feel raw. She was suddenly down to my side, my level. She took me in her arms, an unusually occurrence.

"Shhh. It'll be okay. I'll be back. I'll visit you. It will be hard, but you have to be strong for a while. But Cassie, sweetie, look around," I did. I focused away from my mother, from her betrayal. What I saw was a very large house, an impossibly large house, a house where it could be very easy to become lonely. "All of this house to explore. You can have your own adventures here without your daft old mum getting in the way. There are books, so many books to read. All of history to experience through them. The kitchen," she pointed to her left, "it is filled with enough food to last you a hundred years. Learn to cook! Learn to create. Sweetie, I know it will be okay." My breath was still sharp but the tears had stopped. She made a movement to let go of me, but I held on a bit longer. I didn't want her to let go. Her letting go meant being alone. I was mature for a ten year old, wise from my experiences, but I could feel the last ounces of my childhood draining with every second that past.

I finally let go. She stood up. I did as well. She kissed my forehead. Ruffled my blonde hair. And before leaving said: "Cassandra Amelia Song, don't you dare leave this house until I come back! Love you so much sweetie" Then she was gone.

I haven't seen her since.

**Please review. Tell me what you think. I would really appreciate it.**


	2. Chapter One: Insanity and the Impossible

Chapter One:

"Should I go to the third floor library or finish my to scale replica of the Empire State Building? Well I am nearly done reading all the books in that library, but if I finish the Empire State Building, then I'll only have three more buildings till I will have successfully replicated all of Manhattan." I had started talking to myself six months into my own, personal solitary confinement. Four and a half years later, it was just getting worse. I wasn't quite sure how long it was, days wise. They all seemed blurred together. Now, as torturous as those days alone were, I did learn a whole lot about both myself and the past. I had learned that I hated silence. I had learned that I could read an entire library filled with books in a week. I learned that my mother was imprisoned for killing a man, though references did not specify who. I learned how to make things explode. How to make life. I learned how to cope.

"I think that the library is the best idea" God I was getting tired of my own voice. I headed for the library, counting each step on the staircase. The same thing I had done everyday. Always thirteen. It never changed. Thirteen stairs separating the floor. Eleven floors. Two hundred seventy three rooms per floor. I counted them. Everyday. Those numbers became my friends. The books in the four hundred seven libraries became my parents. I was slowly becoming insane. The third floor looked the same as ever. The floor had that same red carpeting from the first time I saw it, the doors were still mahogany.

"1...2...3...4...5" I found the library and was just reaching towards the handle when I sensed movement out of the corner of my eye. Movement was impossible. I was the only thing capable of moving in this place. I was the only one here. My heart raced. It hadn't done that since my old life. Since before I was put into my version of prison. Not daring to move, I looked out the corner of my eyes and saw more of the impossible. A door. I door that was not made of mahogany. A door I had never seem before. A door that was marked simply with the number eleven.

I stood there for a second. Perplexed. Not quite sure of what to do. Carefully I walked towards it. My ears were pounding along the same beat as my heart. I reached my hand toward the door, it shook. Almost there. I could almost feel the metal of the knob when yet another surprise came: The ring of a doorbell. I yelped like a dog in shock and without second guessing myself, flew down the stairs.

No one ever visited me. That was a fact. Even, my darling mother who had promised. Maybe I was delusional after being isolated for so long, or maybe because of the mysterious door, but without giving it any though I swung the front door open expecting to see mum. Instead, there, standing directly in front of me, was the next impossible thing of the day.

"Hello! I'm-"

"The Doctor!" My voice rang, finishing his sentence. Then, in all my glory, I fainted.


	3. Chapter Two: To Run Again

"Welcome back!"

My eyes opened to see A) A man, who for my entire life I thought was a fictional character, B) with my head resting delicately on his knees on the C) floor in front of the door. It was an odd thing to wake up to. I struggled to my feet. The back of my head hurt, so I must have fallen hard on the ground. I turned away from the Doctor, still unsure if he was real or something my loneliness created to play a trick on my.

"So," I began. "Are you real?"

"Course I'm real. If I wasn't how could I do this?" And with that he ran in the direction of my kitchen with me only a couple paces behind him. Upon entering I realized for the first time how messy I have been in the past five years. You forget sometimes. The piles just turn into other forms of furniture and the wrappers become little leaves, sprinkling the floor. I think the Doctor realized it as well because he turned to me quite suddenly.

"How old are you?" I never had that "stranger danger" talk because everyone was a stranger to me, but I knew enough to figure that telling any personal information was not a very good idea. However, this man was the Doctor, at least I thought he was the Doctor, and what's the worse that could happen?

"Fifteen..."

"Where's your mum and dad? This place, it's huge. Bigger on the inside. I approve. But even in a house this big, I'm sure good ol' mum and dad would notice this mess." I bit my lip. The topic of dad was easy: Don't have one. Mum, not so much. Lie. That's what I thought. Lying is good at solving problems like this one. Well, maybe not lie, but definitely do not, under any circumstances, tell the truth.

"Don't have a dad. Never did. Mum is out. She'll be back soon. Anyway, I've been on my own a long time. I've managed it perfectly well, it's just a bit messy, that's it," I crossed my arms. "I'm not completely convinced you are real, yet."

"Well, we will just have to fix that!" He cleared space on the cluttered stove top. "Cup of tea or hot chocolate. Which would convince you I'm real?"

"Definitely hot chocolate." I went to the table and upon further inspection realized tidying up was a good idea. So the Doctor prepared me hot chocolate while I cleaned the table. We also talked. Have you ever met your childhood hero, only to find they aren't as amazing as you thought? Me neither. The Doctor was just as mad and as wonderful as he was in my stories.

"I once went to a planet called Dementatia, where the mountains are literally made from chocolate! Well technically it isn't really chocolate... or mountains, but the people there are quite friendly!"

"Doctor, why are you here? I've heard all about you and never once does it ever say you just pop by random people's houses for visits"

"Well I came here by accident, told the TARDIS one thing, she took me here. I was looking for some friends of mine: Amy Pond? Amy Williams? Rory Williams? Ring any bells?" I shook my head. "Oh well, it was worth trying."

"They probably do live around here. I just wouldn't know, I-" What would the Doctor think? The man of adventures. What would he think about a girl who hasn't been allowed to leave her house in five years? "I- I've read all about you. My mum, she used to have this book filed with stories about you and your adventures. When I was little she would read them to me, she read them to me until my tenth birthday. I have that book now. It was like my cinderella growing up."

"You have an entire book about me? How... interesting." He handed me the scalding cup of hot chocolate and sat down at the table. I joined him.

"When you first popped up at my door I was convinced you weren't really there. I was sure that I was hallucinating it because you just couldn't be there. It was impossible, like that door. I- I can't believe you are actually sitting here." The Doctor gave a smug smile, letting his ego get the better of him, but then as if realizing something he frowned.

"What door?"

"Oh it was just this door I found, but I'm sure I just made the entire thing up. I mean, I've lived here five years, I think I know how many rooms there are. I've counted them enough."

"Of course. It's just that," the Doctor's voice gave away his uncertainty. We sat in silence for a moment. "Well take a sip. Hot chocolate is no use cold. Then it would be chocolate milk and that's rubbish!" I smiled down at the cup and slowly took a big gulp. I'd had plenty of hot chocolate since I was left in this house. The cupboards were filled with all the ingredients for it, but this hot chocolate was different. I spotted a package for baking chocolate near the stove. Real hot chocolate from scratch! I used the instant powder crap. This hot chocolate was rich and thick and felt as if I was swallowing a cloud of chocolate.

"I learned to cook in France in the seventeenth century? No! Nineteenth century. Or maybe it wasn't France. Was it Barcelona? Not the city, the planet. Barcelona! It's amazing! There are-"

"Dogs with no noses!" I laughed. Barcelona (the planet of course) was one of my favorite places that mum took me. I was seven and was amused by anything anyway, but those dogs! I mean no noses! How hilarious?

"Isn't that great? No noses!" The Doctor was now laughing too. It was a good moment, felt so right. There, with the Doctor, laughing at the most ridiculous, irrelevant thing. I was honestly happy for the first time in a very long while. Still chuckling, the Doctor continued.

"How do you know about that? Was it in a book? Huge house, must be plenty of books in here."

"No," a smile still plastered on my face, I absentmindedly responded. "Mum and I spent two months there. She always-" I abruptly stopped. What the hell was I doing? I was telling him too much. One more loss of judgement and he would know who my mum was and that couldn't happen.

"You went there?" His question pierced through the wall I was trying to construct. Lie? No, wouldn't work. Tell the truth? Definitely not! Change the subject? Doable. Clearing my voice, I said the only thing I could think of: "Why do you wear a bow tie? A bit nutty professor, don't you think?"

"Hey!" The Doctor tugged at his bow tie protectively. "Bow ties are cool."

"Sure they are," I laughed. "Like suspenders and tweed. Oh you are the king of cool."

"Says the girl," he reached out and flicked my nose, "wearing horned rimmed glasses."

"Well I need them! Why do you need your bow tie? To help your neck keep that giant chin of yours up?" We were both smiling again. My diversion had worked like a charm.

"Obviously you just aren't as cool as I am," he got up suddenly. He movements were so spastic that it looked like he had a terrible itch. "Bathroom?" I pointed him the way. He sauntered off, humming down the hallway until he was out of sight.

I tried very hard to come to terms with what had just happened. My childhood hero turns up on my door step, quite surprisingly, real and makes me the best hot chocolate I've ever tasted. The weirdest aspect of this whole shenanigan is that I feel like I can trust him. Being alone for so long, you'd think I would have forgotten how to communicate. When I was talking to the Doctor it was so easy, so natural. I didn't understand it.

An obnoxious whizzing noise arose from some floor above me. In my story book, the Doctor has this wand thing. Actually it's called a sonic screwdriver. When he uses it, either he's up to something or in trouble. I figured it was the prior.

I got up, sipped the last bit of hot chocolate, and ran off to where the noise was coming from. Up the thirteen stairs to the first floor. No, not there. Second floor, closer. Finally, I found him on the third floor. Sonic screwdriver in hand, the Doctor marched right up to me.

"It was here, wasn't it?" He demanded.

"What was here?" I looked at him and suddenly realized what he meant. "You mean that door? I told you, I was probably delusional." All the same, I refused to look at the place where I saw that impossible door earlier.

"You know how before you said the same thing and I told you that you were probably right. Well, I lied."

"But how can there be a door I never saw before?Really Doctor, I have lived in this house for five years. Every second of the past five years, I have been here. Every single day I've counted the rooms. I don't understand..." I tried to keep calm, but my head was spinning. Too much was happening after far to long of nothing.

"You never leave this house?" The Doctor cocked his head to the side. "Why?"

"I'm not allowed to," my voice was small, like a child's.

"You're not allowed to? What ever happened to being a teenage rebel? To not always following the rules?"

"My mum told me to never leave."

"Where is this mother of yours? She leaves all by yourself and expects you to stay inside everyday? I'd really like to hear what the hell she is thinking."

"You can't."

"I can't? Why not?" I bit my lip. There was no getting past this moment.

"She's in prison." That shut him up. He opened his mouth like he wanted to say something, closed it, opened it again and finally uttered: "So you're all alone?"

Nod.

"I am so sorry. It's terrible, isn't it?"

"Yeah," I managed squeak. I cleared my throat. "It really sucks." The Doctor took one last look toward the hallways. He shook his head, and looked back at me now wearing a wicked smile.

"Are you any good at running?"

"I was born running," I returned the smile. "But it's been a while."

"Then I think it's time for you to run again." His hand found mine and with the excitement of a hyper puppy, led me down the stairs. Away from the third floor. Away from the two hundred seventy three rooms. Away from the impossible door.


	4. Chapter Three: Of Life and Infinity

"This is the TARDIS. Bigger on the inside." The Doctor spun around, giving off an air of smugness.

"Yeah, I know that bit. Your adventures used to put me to sleep as a child. Plus bigger on the inside, not very impressive." His smile faltered a bit so I added: "But the interior is gorgeous. It's like a dream, something right out of a fairy tale." This seemed to brighten his mood and, honestly, I had meant what I said.

"So, all of space, all of time. We could go anywhere!" He bent down in an exaggerated bow. "Your wish is my command."

"Anywhere?"

"And any when," The Doctor added before turning toward the TARDIS console. "The whole wide universe!"

I had been many of places within the first ten years of life. I thought back to my past adventures, some of which had been forgotten in time. Where have I not been? Only one concrete idea came to me.

"Open space." The Doctor turned to me, but slower than his usual manner. His eyes met mine and it hit me how old he seemed. Those eyes, those ancient eyes, looked right through me with all the wisdom of an oak tree or a supernova. Then he gave a small smile.

"You are the first person who ever asked to be taken there. I have just the spot. Come along-" He stopped abruptly. "I'm taking you on glorious adventures through time and space and I don't even know your name."

I laughed. "Cassie, my name's Cassie."

"Cassie, lovely name. Why don't you come along up here and see where the magic happens!" He gestured to the TARDIS console. I skipped to the spot next to him.

The console was an amazing mishmash of old and new technology jumbled together as if it was part of some insane garage sale. There was something else about it, too: It was alive. I could feel the life radiating from it, calling me to it. Not physically communicating with me, but I gravitated towards it, no, towards her. There was something that was happening between the two of us, between the TARDIS and I. I could feel an invisible force guide my hands over this majestic console. All of a sudden I knew what each gadget did and all the possibilities of this blue box entered my mind.

Remembering that the Doctor was there, I turned to him. He was staring at me intently.

"What?"

"Cassie, are you alright?" I jerked my fingers away from the console.

"Yeah, sorry, it's just so incredible!" The Doctor looked at me for another moment then turned back to the TARDIS and smiled like a child in a toy store.

Pulling down a lever and pressing a multitude of buttons, he yelled, "Geronimo!"

…

I was floating in the middle of the universe. Everywhere I looked, I saw stars and planets, but also darkness and empty space. It was a mosaic of life, death, time, and infinity. My heart raced, reminding me I was still alive. I was still here, but the longer I stayed, the more unreal I felt. It was beautiful and terrifying and, oh, so sad, all at the same time. I had forgotten all else: The Doctor, my past, my present, myself and felt every atom in me become part of this vast universe. We could float together forever. Nothing else mattered at that moment. Nothing but the lights and blackness and matter. I don't care what anyone else says, science is beautiful.

I could register the tears in my eyes, I could make out my sobs, but they felt more like a memory than something that actually was happening. I was so small, but so large at the same time.

"Cassie!" I felt life coming back to me. The Doctor was calling me out of this trance. I turned to him, still floating and realized this entire time I was a mere fifteen feet away from the TARDIS. "Why are you crying?" Concern trickled from his voice. Self consciously, I wiped my eyes.

"I'm alright. I'm fine. It's nothing really." I made my way back to the TARDIS, swimming across the universe. The Doctor's hand was held out toward me. When I got hold of it, he pulled me back to the safety and brilliance of the TARDIS.

"You're sure nothing's wrong?" I was on my feet again, missing the vastness of the universe already.

"Everything is wonderful! The universe, it's – it's-" I was searching for the right word. "It's awesome!"

"Awesome?" He laughed. "Very sophisticated word choice Cassie."

"Not like 'That blouse is awesome!', but the old, biblical meaning of awesome. Awe inspiring, breathtaking, wondrous. It's grand and indescribable and, yes, awesome," I turned my back to the universe and headed back to the console. "Doctor," I asked. "After all these years of traveling, does it ever get boring, seeing the universe like that?"

"Never."

"I didn't think so."

We were back to the console now, the Doctor and I. Destinationless and quiet.

"You're really something Cassie." The Doctor wasn't looking at me, he seemed to be staring very intently toward a screen.

"Thanks..." Silence again. "How about you choose where we go now?" The Doctor nodded, but he seemed distracted. I didn't like how quiet he was being, but maybe I just didn't like quiet in general anymore.

"Are you human, Cassie?" He was still looking at that freaking screen.

"Yeah, course," I waited for him to look at me before continuing. "Is something up with you Doctor?"

"No, no, nothing at all. Not one bit!" He rubbed his hands together. "Now where are we off to? Haven't been to New Earth in a while. What do you think? New Earth? Cat people? Adventure?"

"Sure!" I laughed, craning my neck, trying to catch sight of what was on the screen. With the turn of a knob, the Doctor turned the screen off, discouraging my efforts. Hmph.


	5. Chapter Four: The Return of Three

Traveling with the Doctor can make a month feel like a lifetime. You forget how your life used to be. You only remember the times you two have had and nothing else can seem to catch up with you. Well most things. After New Earth we went to the Not-So-Lost-Anymore Moon of Poosh, the Gamma Forests, the Library (while there the Doctor was very sad. I asked him why and he responded by saying that he had lost a very good friend there. I didn't pester him about it after that), Space Florida, the Coffee Shop planet (voted #1 most beautiful planet. I don't know why, it was terribly dull), and tons more. Each time we encountered dangers and ran for our lives. It was the most frightening and fun times of my life. Or at least my life since mum disappeared.

"My lovely Cassie, what awaits us next?" The Doctor asked after our latest excursion to 1970s New York (Groovy!). He was still dressed in his suit, tweed, and suspenders except his bow tie was now tie dyed, instead of it's usual red or blue.

"No matter where it is, it won't be as psychedelic as 1973! Anyway, I have an idea. Doctor?"

"Yeah?"

"I think we should go back."

"Back to the seventies already? Those flowers and colors were nice and all, but with everything else out there, it isn't that amazing."

"No," I chuckled. "Not the seventies. I meant I think we should go back to my house. Earth. 2011."

"Are you leaving me already, Cassie, dear?"

"I just think that we have unfinished business there. After it's taken care of, we can go back to being the best runaways in all the universe."

"Suit yourself," the Doctor shrugged. "Well in that case..." He pulled a lever on the TARDIS.

"GERONIMO!" We yelled in unison.

…

"Well, here we are and only five minutes after we originally left. I think. Or maybe it's five weeks. I'm not very good at getting my timing quite right. I blame the TARDIS. Stubborn box," he teased, patting that ancient blue box.

"Remember that door? I think it's about time we know what's in it." The Doctor nodded.

"Geronimo?" The Doctor took my hand and squeezed it.

"Geronimo," I squeezed his hand back.

We moved together towards the house. The last time I really saw that house from that angle was the day mother had brought me there. It was like deja vu. Over the years I had realized mum was as big of a mystery to me as the vastness of the universe. She killed a man, that I knew, but when? How? Who? She said she loved me, but either she didn't trust me or she didn't love me as much as I had thought. Leaving me for five years, she probably didn't love me at all.

The Doctor, though, he was here now. My guardian quota seemed to be filled for the first time in ages. He was like my mother in ways and very different in others. He was everywhere at once, a mystery, a pacifist when he could help it, and most of all he seemed to genuinely care about my well being. That past month with him had been the happiest I could remember. The running was exhilarating and the adventures were amazing, but mostly it was the Doctor who made this time special. His company, his personality, his wisdom, and his whole self was such a presence. So that walking to this house, I had a new hope and view about it.

When I got to the front door I became aware that I didn't have the key.

"Doctor, a little help here." I gestured to the door. In a flash, the Doctor had this sonic in hand and that whizzing sound began. _Clink_. The door opened slowly.

It was a mess! Not like how I had left it, but completely ransacked. There was broken furniture everywhere.

"What-" I looked up at the Doctor.

"Split up. Find something. Back here in five?" Before I could respond, the Doctor was off, down a hall and out of sight.

I was in shock. Mostly I was shocked that someone would take their time to do this to my house. A house I had despised. A house I had lived in for five years and I happen to leave for 5 minutes and this is what happens? It couldn't be a coincidence. They wanted to make sure I wasn't there. Was someone spying on my for all that time? I couldn't stay in the entrance hall, that I knew. I had to find evidence. I ran down the hall towards the kitchen. My table was turned over, plates were smashed everywhere, and food littered the floor. It was sort of heart breaking, you know? Like someone had vandalized my life. I tried to think back. Was there anything that I cared about in this house?

The book! My fairy tales about the Doctor. I knew him now, but that book had always been my solace. It had brought me through dark times and I would not abandon it now. Where was it? I thought back to last month (well from that time really only five minutes or so). I had been working in the third floor library, I was going there when the Doctor swept me away. Now I was going back. I could picture that blue book next to my pile of books to read. Alone. Waiting for me to return.

The walk up those thirty nine stairs was cluttered with debris. When I finally arrived on the third floor it was covered with books and clothes and glass. I counted out the five rooms until I reached the library. The sight inside almost made me cry. Books were everywhere. Destroyed. Pages glittered the floor and the covers and spines were completely separated. I frantically searched for the one book that I truly cared about. Like a miracle, after piles of pages, I found it completely intact. I hugged it to me. The leather was familiar and still smelled vaguely of the adventures I had with mum. I knew that the Doctor would be back at our meeting place, but I didn't care. I needed to look inside my book again. Feel that magic. So there in the middle of the wreck, I opened the book up. There he was, my Doctor, bow tied and all. His features were blurred, but he was utterly recognizable. I wished I could tell mum that he was real. That all those stories that she used to read me were true.

Tucking the book under my arm, I scrambled to my feet. The battle field that used to be a library was too depressing. I decided that I really should head back to meet the Doctor, he might worry. Then I heard it.

"Cassie!" It wasn't the Doctor. The voice, it was out of a distant memory.

"Mum?" I whispered. Her voice was coming from nearby. Not the library, but close. I whipped the door open and found myself looking right at that door. The impossible door, The only thing that had caught up with me. It had plagued my mind for a month, but I was ready to confront it. Anyway, I figured, mum was in there. I knew that she had to be. It was all making sense, in a way that it made no sense at all.

The door was ajar, I silently peeked through. There she was. The same as the day she left. She seemed to be struggling against something that was restricting her hands. They looked like handcuffs, except they were attached to the wall. River Song, my mother, looked terrified.

"Mum!" I yelled, opening the door all the way and running to her.

"Cassie!" She stopped struggling. "Where the hell have you been?"

"I was with the Doctor! All those stories you used to read me, mum, they're true! He's real and we were going on adventures." My excitement dwindled, though, as I stared at her. I took a step away from my mum. "You abandoned me for five years. It nearly drove me insane. I hate you! I hate what you did to me!"

Mum was about to respond when we heard foot steps.

"Hide!" She commanded. I shouldn't have done it, but her tone reminded me of my childhood. All those times she had uttered that same word. So I did.

"Cassie! Are you alright, I think I- River?" That Doctor had entered the room and was staring quite incredulously at mum. _River?_ I thought. _He knows who she is? They know each other?_ I couldn't fathom what was happening, so, hidden safely from view under a sheet, I viewed the scene in front of me unfold.

"Hello Sweetie!" Mum put on her most mischievous smile. "Mind helping me out of this? It might come back."

"What might come back? Why are you here?"

"Spoilers." mum teased. This seemed to infuriate the Doctor.

"River, there is a girl, Cassie, she lives here. Have you seen her? If you won't tell me anything, I might as well find my friend and leave."

"Haven't seen this Cassie girl. Is she pretty? You always like the pretty ones, don't you?"

"Honestly, River." The Doctor turned to leave. "This girl. She's been alone for a long time. Not as long as me, but still. I need to make sure she's okay."

"Doctor," mum's tone changed. Her voice was serious and kind. "Doctor, I know you always try to help, but please, this once go. Leave this girl behind. Get into your TARDIS and fly away."

"Why?" He faced mum once more. "Why should I listen to anything you say? Ever since I met you, you've been keeping secrets from me."

"But I always told you in the end, didn't I? I told you about Melody and Mels and my past. All in time. And this time, I'm telling you to leave." Mum struggled with the handcuffs, but it was useless. "Doctor, help me out of these and then go off and have adventures and save the world like you always do."

"Who is Cassie to you?" The Doctor walked right up to River. Their faces inches from one another.

"She's nothing, but I don't want you to do the same thing you did to Amy to her. You are a wonderful man, Doctor. Too good." She looked at him. "Doctor, please."

The Doctor bit his lip. "River, I-" But then their lips met. Mum, my mum, was snogging the Doctor and the Doctor, much to my surprise and disgust, was kissing her back. It was a very thorough kiss. I couldn't take it anymore.

"What the bloody hell is going on?" I was on my feet. The sheet that had been my hiding place was on the floor next to me. The Doctor quickly backed away from mum. His mouth was open as if he wanted to say something, his hands moving as if trying to communicate what was happening. It was useless. Finally the Doctor, embarrassed, put his hands to his side and closed his mouth, looking at the floor. I let him be, instead I turned to mum and walked right up to her.

"You knew he was real? You always knew him and you didn't tell me? And now you're snogging him, knowing perfectly well that I was in the room. You were snogging my childhood!"

"Cas, it's complicated."

"I'm sure it is," I couldn't talk to her anymore. I had missed her, yeah, but I was starting to wish that I was alone in this house again. No mum, no Doctor, just me.

"I'm done with all this mystery. I used to think I had the best life. Maybe not when I was here for five bloody years, but when I was with you and then when I was with the Doctor. Now I hate it. More than anything." I couldn't look at mum, I couldn't look at the Doctor. I turned my back on them. I walked straight out of room and straight into a man. Well not really a man. He was made of metal. I had read about them, but never expected to see one: A cyberman.


	6. Chapter Five: Running Towards Metal Men

"You will be assimilated!"

A scream escaped my lips.

"CASSIE?" I could hear the Doctor and mum screaming my name, but I turned to see that the door was closed. I frantically started banging on it.

"Doctor! Sonic it!" I pleaded and soon enough I could hear that familiar whizzing, but it wasn't working. The Doctor kicked the door.

"Deadlock!" He sounded defeated. "Cassie, you have to run. The cybermen are are slow on their feet. Run away." I obeyed. I pushed pass the cyberman, ran down the stairs and onto the second floor. Quickly I registered what exactly was on the second floor. Libraries, seventeen of them. A room that simulated a forest. Twelve bedrooms. Three rooms that simulated shopping malls. A room filled with medieval weapons and torture devices. And other rooms I couldn't remember at the moment. Libraries and malls were useless, as were the bedrooms. The Medieval fun room was a definite no.

I could hear the clanking of the cyberman following me. I made up my mind. The forest would have to do. He was on the same floor as me now. Running I counted the doors. 1...2...3...4...5...6...7...8...9...10...11. I opened the door and shut it immediately. There was no lock.

"Damn it!" I yelled to the door. I looked around me. I had only been in the forest once and had gotten lost. Not fun. But now I was relying on the cyberman getting lost. I past the first couple trees going straight, then abruptly turned right and left and turned so many times that I had no idea where I was. I wondered how large this room was. I could hear noises either from the cyberman or other unknown terrors. No matter what I kept running. I ran through the trees, making zigzags and loopdeloops. Hoping, praying to a god I never believed in, that I wouldn't run into the cyberman. I had read that they killed all the human in you, turning you into an emotionless robot. Turning you into one of them.

A crazy thought popped into my head: _Maybe that wouldn't be so bad._ Emotions sucked. Thy built up and then, at any moment, became crushed. I was a perfect example of that. Mum had broke my heart. The Doctor betrayed my trust. I couldn't even deal with the inner workings of myself. I was too much. At that moment, life was too much. I could feel reality weighing down on me, suffocating me. I stopped running.

I felt the cyberman getting closer. The floor dirt covered floor shook with every metallic _clunk._ Fear started to fill me, I knew what was coming. Yet I stood my ground, treasuring this fear, this last human emotion. Closing my eyes, I wished for the end. The clinking came closer and closer until finally it stopped.

"You will be assimilated," its voice was broken and robotic. I felt the scan in every inch of my body. Holding my breath, I slowly opened my eyes. I knew I was taking the easy way out, but I wouldn't go without looking my conquerer in its cold, blank eyes. The transformation of Cassie Song was imminent.

"You are not compatible."

"Excuse me?"

"You are not human," it took a clunking step towards me. "You cannot be assimilated." My brain was cranking back to life. Not human?

"Of course I'm human you piece of scrap metal!"

The cyberman lifted its arm. "You are not human. You will be disposed of." I knew what that would mean: Death. Not conversion, total and utter death. Such a finality about it. I thought about death. No, death couldn't be an option. I started to back up.

"No! I don't want to die." The cyberman took a another step forward.

"You will be deleted." What the hell had I done? I allowed this to happen with my moment of desperation. I wanted emptiness so badly. I was a coward. I thought back . What would mum do? What would the Doctor do? Keep them talking, that's what they would do. Save my time.

"Why are you here?" I took a tiny step back. "Of all the houses, you chose mine, why? You can tell me. I'll be dead soon."

"This is not your house." The cyberman was talking, but I stopped listening. I looked around for anything. A miracle.

"Then hy did you need me out of the house?"

"We did not."

"We? There's more of you?" Step by step, slowly I was moving backwards. My eyes sweeping over every inch of forest I could see. I knew it was a simulation, but there had to be something of use.

"No, but there will be," every step I took it followed. "The word we is irrelevant."

"Okay, okay. Then what are you here for?" I saw a glimpse of wire in the tree next to me. It was giving off a faint glow at the tip. Must have thousands of volts running through there. An idea suddenly came to me.

"We are here for the Doctor."

"Will the Doctor agree to whatever it is you have planned?" I slowly grabbed the covered part of the wire.

"The Doctor will not have control." I spotted the exact target of the wire – a small opening between the helmet and neck. I had one shot to do this.

"Maybe not," I jerked the wire forward, plunging it right into the chink in the cyberman's armor. "But I do!" The cyberman began to jerk about until, with a burst of sparks, something inside it exploded. I took this opportunity and ran.

I ran in what seemed like a slower time stream until I found the door. The exit. I grasped it, pulled, and flung myself out, into the hallway. I shut the door behind me and ran.

I didn't want to go back to the third floor. My heart was racing, adrenaline was pumping through my veins and all I wanted to do was run. It felt so good to keep going. I ran up and up and up. I flew past the floors. The thirteen steps between them were no match for me. My mind went blank as if my legs were the only part of me that thought. Bringing me up and up and up until I couldn't go up anymore.

I reached the eleventh floor with a pounding heart and reminders to breath occupying my brain. I leaned against the wall, falling to a sitting position on the carpeted floor. _Ba-Ba-Bum-Bum._ I loved the way my heart beat. It was bragging that the cyberman had not won, that it was still beating. I allowed myself time on the floor to calm down. The eleventh floor was almost like the control center for the rest of the house. Each room dealt with a different aspect of the house. There was a room that was filled to the brim with light bulbs. A room for linens. A room of carpentry materials. A room of screens that went through all the security cameras – one for each room – a displayed the happenings on one of the screens. Eleven screens. One per floor. This was the room I went to.


	7. Chapter Six: To Listen But Not Hear

It was very grey. Grey walls, bare white lights, black and white flickering screens, and a large black chair on wheels. I sank into the chair and spun to where the third floor screen was. Mum wasn't the only one who could get information out of people, unbeknownst to them. I rolled up to the screen till I was inches away and waited. The pictures changed. Library. Click. Bedroom. Click. Beach simulation. Click. Laboratory. Click. On and on until I saw them. Mum still all tied up and the Doctor was pacing. Quickly, I tapped the screen. Now it wouldn't change, it would be stuck on this channel, the feature presentation. The Doctor was speaking, but I couldn't hear him. There was a little volume icon on the bottom left corner. If I pressed it, I would be officially spying on them. I was mad, sure, but information can be a scary thing. Did I really want to know what they were saying? Yes, maybe. Yes! Yes I really did!

No more secrets, no more "it's complicated, sweetie", no more surprises. I pressed the little volume icon and the speakers turned on with a tiny _click_.

"- back to Stormcage. After ten years! River, that's cheating."

"Would you rather she was adopted by some mental couple? Would that really be better? They could have found out who she is, what she is. You thought I was raised as a weapon? Ha! She could have meant the end of the universe. Doctor, look me in the eyes and tell me I'm wrong."

The Doctor avoided her eyes. "You still had no right."

"Doctor, be sensible!"

"Me? Not being sensible? HA!" He gave out a cold laugh. "I'm being completely and utterly sensible." His hair was sticking up in all directions, his voice had risen to a scream, and his eyes were large and wild. He most definitely did not seem sensible.

"You really aren't, my love," mum's voice was softer now, calming. "Now, please, sonic these bloody things off my wrists and we'll sort this out."

The Doctor seemed to deflate before my eyes. He gave a weak nod.

"But – But I don't understand. She can't – I can't be-" The Doctor looked completely defeated. He was sitting on the ground, his knees up with his arms resting on them. Mum was rubbing her newly free wrists. "River, I can't do this."

"Then run away, my love," there was no pity in her voice. I waited there, in that grey room, for an answer. Instinct told me that they were talking about me, but that didn't make the subject much clearer.

"I hate you," the Doctor finally huffed.

"No you don't."

"You're right," he gave a sigh. He seemed so old in that moment. "I don't. I'll try the door again. See if it's open." The Doctor made his way to the door. They weren't talking anymore, but I could feel the tension between them from just watching the screen. I had always believed I was good at solving puzzles, but none of the pieces were fitting together. There was a vital chunk missing in my understanding and it, somehow, concerned me.

The spying was becoming useless. I was only getting more and more confused. I reached out to touch the little volume icon, to mute it. However, right before I got the chance I heard this escape the Doctor's lips:

"She doesn't know, does she?" The Doctor's hand was outstretched toward the doorknob. I could see mum sadly shake her head.

"No. I think it would destroy her." Then silence. I wouldn't hear anymore. I couldn't. I put the screen back to flipping through the other rooms and sat there. I let the grey consume me. Facing them was inevitable. It would happen sooner or later, whether I wanted it to or not. I couldn't simply ask them what was happening, it would make me feel like a child and I wasn't. I hadn't been for a while. Mum couldn't just show up after years and years and expect me to be the same Cassie she left. Her little girl was no more. She had missed five birthdays, seven inches of growth, and several bad hair decisions. She had missed out on my life. Now she was here and I wasn't sure what the hell was going on.

I would do what I did with that ruddy cyberman. I would let them find me. Somehow I knew that the door wouldn't have deadlock anymore. I knew that if I stood in the stairwell long enough, they would come. I made my way out of the room and set up camp – well I say camp, really I was just standing – in the stairwell. Soon enough, I heard mum and the Doctor's muffled voices. Come at me.

I heard their steps getting closer to me. They ran in unison, creating a collective _thud, thud_ towards where I stood. It's funny how you notice these things sometimes. In moments where an infinite amount of things are more important, you manage to notice the smallest detail. I could see the mum then, a few feet ahead of the Doctor. She saw me immediately and quickened her pace. No longer were the _thud_s together. That perfect simultaneous symmetry broken. I waited there. I refused to move towards them. I may have let them catch me, but under no circumstance would I allow either of them to fully regain my trust or love. Not a chance, dearies.

"Cas! Cassie, my love, are you alright? What happened?" She was at my a by my side. Her face contorted with concern

"Cas?" The Doctor was next to her now. He didn't seem to be able to look quite at me. Curious... "I thought she was called Cassie."

Mum turned to him. "Really Doctor? This is what you say? Goodness, why do I put up with you?" She faced back to me. "Cas, that was a cyberman, yeah? What did you do?" I looked straight ahead. I felt the teenager in me emerge from its depths.

"It's not a problem anymore. No thanks to you two." From the corner of my eye, I caught a glimpse of mum biting her lip._ Ha! I hope you feel guilty_, I thought. "It chased me to the room with the simulated forest. I found a wire that was hanging loosely off a tree and was giving off dangerous looking sparks. The cyberman met with an awfully electrifying end." I was quite proud of my accomplishment, but I tried not to show it. I had done that. Me, by myself. No help from my rubbish mum and the "oncoming storm". Like hell he was. Useless.

"That was very clever." This was the Doctor who spoke. He was staring at me like... I don't even know how he was looking at me. He was acting very strange. I thought back to my spying. What did he know?


	8. Chapter Seven: The Price of Truth

I ignored the Doctor's comment. No way was I going to let a little flattery get to me. Anyway, I'm sure the Doctor calls plenty of people clever.

"There's something you two are keeping from me. Something important," I started to walk down the stairs. They followed. Now who was in control? "I want to know what it is. You will sit down with me and tell me. I won't have any of that complicated nonsense." I turned mid-step to mum. "You owe it to me." She gave a short nod.

We walked in silence all the way till the dining room. It was a complete mess down there. Smashed dishes were everywhere and a miscellaneous of food seemed to be layering every surface. First things first, I picked up the table and set it right. The Doctor tried to help but I glared at him so fiercely that he retreated back to his little spot next to mum. Next I had to put three chairs in an upright position. I slowly dragged each one to a respective spot, letting the _clunk_ hang in the air before retrieving the next chair. It was a long, arduous process. Everything was building up. The energy in the room was frightfully sharp and explosive. The clock was ticking away until whatever the hell was happening would finally be revealed.

If I looked straight ahead I could see both of them at the opposite side of the table. Mum looked troubled. She had concerned lines on her face. It was exactly how I had remembered it. She didn't appear to have aged at all over those five years. No difference what so ever. The Doctor, on the other hand, seemed a thousand years older than he had that morning. He was looking down at the table as it it held all the mysterious of the universe. It was time, though none of us were ready.

"So, what is it?" At this the Doctor looked up.

"I just want you to know I didn't know any of this. When I took you with me it was because I thought you were alone. It wasn't right of me to have stolen you away, but I swear I never meant-"

"Cassie!" Mum's voice was hard and commanding. I jumped in my seat. "Duck!" I obeyed and just in time. I felt the object fly over my head and helplessly watched it hitting mum square in the chest. She fell backward onto the floor and lay there, motionless.

"Mum!"

"River!" The Doctor's voice and mine rang out at the same moment. I looked behind me. The cyberman, in all his metal glory stood there, arm outstretched.

"Doctor?" I ran out of my chair in a weird sideways fashion. Like hell I was turning my back on the cyberman, although the last attack seemed to have drained it of its power for the moment. I crouched beside mum. The Doctor was doing the same, screwdriver in hand. "Doctor, is she-"

"She's fine." He didn't seem too sure. The object seemed to be attached to mum's chest. Her eyes were closed and her face looked calm. Too calm. She never looked that calm. "Cassie," The Doctor looked at me. "You have to run. Get out of here."

"I don't want to run anymore."

"You need to. The cyberman will kill you. I'll keep River safe. Please, Cassie."

"I'm not leaving her. She's my mum." There was a pained look on The Doctor's face. My own face was wet with tears I couldn't remember shedding. I looked down at mum. I gently wiped a curl from her forehead. Was this it? Was it going to end like this? I looked back to the Doctor. "I'm staying."

"Cassie, Cassie, Cassie" he leaned over mum and gave me a kiss on the forehead then pressed his forehead against mine. There was so much love in that one move, that I could no longer hate him. All the resentment for him and mum melted.

"Yeah?" My voice was small and high. More of a squeak than a response. He leaned back and held my face in his hands.

"She might be your mum, but I'm-" The cyberman was moving now. Somehow, it had restored enough to come towards us. The Doctor looked towards it, then back at me. His hands were still cupped around my face. Our eyes locked and he said, "I'm your father and you'll do as I say."

_Father? _I thought. The word was foreign and fanciful. For a moment, it seemed as though I couldn't remember the meaning of it.

"Father?" I was still sitting there. The Doctor was up, moving towards the the cyberman. "You're my – You're my father?" No this couldn't be possible. I mean, he was the Doctor and I didn't have, I couldn't have, I never had a father. More specifically, I couldn't have him as a father. The Doctor was talking the the cyberman now, saying something clever probably. I looked at mum. I wanted to ask her if it was true, I needed her. I properly needed her and she was gone. Dead or wounded or knocked out or who knows what. I shook her shoulder.

"Mum?" My voice was thick. "Mum? Wake up. Wake up. Please wake up." Nothing. If it was true, then that would mean I was part time lord, everything was starting to click. What the cyberman had said, what I had overheard. It all started to make sense.

"I know you needed me," The Doctor's voice rang out. "but why did you come here to wait?"

"We traced your DNA to this location." The cyberman stood where it was, looming over the Doctor.

"But why stay dormant?

"We did not want the girl."

"Why? She's incredibly clever and is bursting with time energy."

"Irrelevant. You are what is needed."

"Why should I help you?" The Doctor sauntered over to the cyberman. He was so close that if he reached out, they would touch. "Or better yet," The Doctor's voice was filled with contempt. "What makes you think I'll help?"

"Your wife is dying." The Doctor took a step back. "We had a plan. We figured out whose house this was. We waited until both you and her were together. You will help us or she will die."


	9. Chapter Eight: Fate of the Young

**Sorry for the short chapter. I needed to get from point A to point B. Enjoy anyway!**

* * *

><p>What happened next changed everything. The Doctor, that he had choose between himself and mum, chose mum.<p>

"What do you need me to do?"

"We are stuck." The cyberman knew it had won. "We need you to repair our ship and then we will need your time energy."

"Okay." The Doctor's voice was so sad that it made me stagger to my feet.

"Why do you need time energy?" This time it was me. I walked towards them, shaking. "Because I've got time energy."

"The Doctor is needed to repair our ship, it is irrelevant who provides the time energy."

"Cassie, no." The Doctor grabbed hold of my wrist and pulled me towards him. "I can't let you do this. What they are asking is a terrible fate, you understand this?"

"Who am I?" I snatched my wrist from him. "I'm just some girl. I'm not important. Doctor, all those stories about you, all our adventures. You are the most important man in the universe. I am dispensable."

"Your mum would never forgive me, I would never forgive myself if I let you go."

"She would. She would forgive you because I'm sure she would do the same if she were up to it." I stood next to the Doctor, I could feel his uncertainty. Then I did it, I hugged him. He hugged me too and it felt as though everything was right in the world for those couple of seconds. When we released, we both knew I was going. "I can't let you die."

"I will save. I will do everything I can and I will rescue you." I didn't believe him.

…

The ship was repaired. Turns out that's been in my house the entire time: A freaking alien spaceship. It took the Doctor five minutes and when it was time for my self sacrifice, I wasn't ready to say good-bye. The cyberman, honest to its word, had detached that thing from mum and she would be waking soon, though I would be gone by then. The Doctor escorted me to the ship. We didn't speak. I knew he was already feeling guilty, but there was nothing he could do. Nothing I would let him do. There were a couple of times where I thought he would make an argument, try to dissuade me, but every time he just clenched his jaw and remained silent.

"You will sit in this chair." I did as I was commanded. The chair was metal and very uncomfortable. I thought of those electric chairs I had read about. The Doctor stood there. He seemed caught.

"Leave," I ordered him. "Please leave and let me go." He quivered."Doctor, I'll be fine. Dad-" my voice caught because when I said that word I knew it was true. I knew he was my father and I knew he loved me. "Dad, I love you and mum. Tell her when she wakes up. Tell her I love her and tell her I'm so very sorry."

"Cassie, I love-" But suddenly there was a great shift as if a wave of metal was forming above me and everything went black.

Then the pain come. It was not gradual, but sudden. It was as if was stabbing every inch of my body. No escape. I screamed and struggled but after a couple hours or days, who knows, I became overwhelmed with exhaustion and my throat was so dry, I blacked out. But even then I felt it, The unbearable pain and I knew that it would never never. I had chosen this fate and all I could do was wait for death. Wait for it and wish for it.

Time didn't work right. I had no idea how long I was in there. It could have been days or months or years, but the only thing that was there was pain and darkness. I would black out for long periods of time and then become conscious then black out. A cycle, a never ending cycle and no relief. I wish I could describe the experience, but it is unlike anything.

When the light came, I thought it was death and welcomed it. But, it wasn't death. It was the Doctor.

**Hope you enjoyed! Please review, I would really appreciate it.**


	10. Chapter Nine: Morning Farewells

"Cassie? Cassie please." The pain was gone. Just like that. I was numb, I couldn't move or speak. I couldn't even open my eyes. The light hurt too much. But there was the voice. So familiar, so close. I opened my mouth and tried to answer but my throat was so dry, my lips so cracked. "Can you hear me? Cassie, nod if you can hear me." The Doctor's voice was so concerned, so desperate that I used all the energy I had to nod.

I could make out his sigh of relief. "You're safe now," he engulfed me in a hug. "You're fine. You're back at your house. The cyberman is gone and you can sleep." I tried to respond, but it was useless. It was so nice now. My brain switched itself off and I slept. I slept for a very long time, though it was a dreamless sleep. I remember waking up a couple of times to water being poured in my mouth, a welcome relief to my raw throat. All seemed well.

When I finally woke up and could struggle (only slightly) to a sitting position, I noticed a couple things. The first was that I was in the bedroom I had slept in for the five years that I had lived in this house, the same lilac colored walls and grey curtains. There was the blue dresser and oval mirror. The light coming from the window was that of early morning. My first thought was that it had all been a dream. The Doctor arriving and taking me to see the universe, mum's return, the cyberman. That was the only reasonable explanation. But then I saw the note scribbled on an index card on my bedside table in red pen: _When you wake up come downstairs. We are making waffles blueberry jam. The Doctor._

I chuckled. So it was true. All those amazing things had happened, as well as the horrible. I was fine now, but I could still remember the pain. It had been my sacrifice and the Doctor had saved me, but I still shivered. I looked down at what I was wearing – my floral night gown – and noticed something else, something peculiar. I perceived that my hands were different. I know that sounds strange, but I think I know my own hands. My fingers were longer and more slender than I could remember them being. I inspected them closer and could have sworn my skin was never as freckled as it was now. Then I noticed something else: The hair, my hair, resting on my shoulders was neither blonde nor the mess of curls it used to be. Soft, auburn waves now surrounded my face.

I ran the dresser, looking in the mirror I saw someone else looking back. She looked about seventeen with grey eyes and red hair. She looked as shocked as I felt. Her cheeks flushed pink in a way I knew mine couldn't. Who was she and why was she in my mirror? I bit my lip, she did the same. I help up my hand, she copied me. I turned away from the mirror, but I could see that she had done the same. I ran out of the room and didn't look back. I was on the second floor so I was only one level away from the kitchen, which meant one level away from the Doctor. My legs ached, they complained about my running, but I ignored them. I could still picture the girl in the mirror. The auburn hair that flew around me while I ran was a constant reminder that something was wrong.

"Doctor! What's happened to-" I ran into the kitchen to find them doing it again. Snogging. Upon my arrival mum and the Doctor parted, but I had seen enough. I don't care if the Doctor's my dear old dad, that's just not okay. "Please, you two, can you not do that here?" I plopped down at the table. The Doctor, like before, looked flustered, but mum just grinned slyly.

"Sweetie, how are you feeling?" She sat down next to me and put her hand on top of mine. It was warm. I liked it.

"A bit achy, but I can live. How are you?"

"I'm superb, dear. Don't worry about me at all." The last time I saw her, she was unconscious. It had scared me so much and I was so relived to see her again, that I no longer felt resentment towards her, or the Doctor for that matter. It had happened and was in the past, everything was where it should be except…

"What's happened to me? Why do I suddenly have red hair and freckles?"

"You're part timelord," this was the Doctor. He walked to the table and took the other empty seat next to me. "Actually you are mostly timelord."

"So?"

"You can regenerate."

"What?" Where had I heard that before? I thought back to my days of research. Timelords did this thing where they changed their appearance. Every atom renewed itself and the same timelord would completely change the way they looked, but I couldn't remember what that was called. Could it be the thing that he was referring to? "Is it that thing where your people can change the way they look?"

The Doctor nodded.

"So that girl I saw in the mirror, I'm her?"

The Doctor nodded again.

"I see…" There was awkward silence. No one really knew what to say. Finally, I got up. "I'm starving, where are the waffles and jam I was promised?"

"We never really got a chance to making them," the Doctor responded. Mum winked. It was really disgusting.

"Well then, better get to it." So they got up and bustled around, going in and out of the pantry. I sat there, watching them and smiled to myself. They were my parents, they were actually parents. Both of them. They were making me breakfast and they were laughing and talking to themselves. It was so routine, so ordinary, yet so beautiful.

The waffles smelled delicious and I got a large whiff of them as mum set the plate down in front of me. My mouth watered. I took the fork in my right hand, but something felt off. It was as if my coordination was unbalanced. My right hand no longer felt right.

"Hey, after this regeneration thing, can other things change?"

"What do you mean?"

"Like my hand," I raised up my right hand. "Can which hand I use to write, eat, and do most other daily habits with change?" The Doctor nodded. "Well then, that's just great." I switched the fork into my left hand and started to eat. I coated every waffle with a layer of gooey blueberry jam. It was so scrumptious that I did not stop eating until there was only a sticky residue left on the plate. Then, content, I leaned back in my chair and sighed.

"So, now what?" I turned to mum. "You have to go back eventually don't you? You can't stay here."

"We've been thinking a lot about that." Mum's eyes looked a bit sad. "I do have to go back to prison. There is no escaping that."

"So I'll be travelling with you then?" I asked the Doctor hopefully. He shook his head.

"It isn't that I don't want that, I really, really do. More than you think, but you're what, sixteen years old now? You've already missed out on so much of the human experience of growing up."

"Like?" I stared at the Doctor, unsure of what he was telling me.

"Like high school."

"High school?" I looked at him, dumbfounded. "Are you serious? I probably know more than most of those people combined."

"But we aren't going to leave you here alone again." Mum leaned over and tucked a loose strand of hair behind my ear. "You need to be surrounded by people your age. You need to live a normal life."

"Why? Why can't I just go on adventures with the Doctor?" I turned to face him. I wasn't exactly angry, just confused. "You said that you wanted that, so why not? It'll be great. It'll make up for the fact that I just found out that I have a father. It'll be like extreme father daughter bonding time, yeah?"

"But it won't be healthy, just you being with me all the time. You need to experience things. High school is a great learning experience. Observe the human teenager in its natural habitat. Have your own adventures." He sounded just like mum had the day she left when I was ten. It was unsettling.

"Right, so say I do go. My only communication will be with people I can't actually talk to about my life. I can't tell them anything and you two will be off and I'll still be alone." I was upset. High school was one thing, but the idea having students being my only companions was unbearable. "Doctor, can't you stay with me? So I won't have to be on my own?" The Doctor's eyes widened. Domestic life was not for him and it was cruel of me to ask it. Asking him to give up the universe was like asking Vincent Van Gogh to stop painting or asking William Shakespeare to stop inserting innuendos into his plays.

"Cassie, sweetieheart, you won't be alone because you'll be staying with my parents." I had grandparents? Well, wasn't my family full of surprises?

"You have parents?" I imagined a little, old couple in their seventies. I had seen enough television to put together the lifestyle I would have to adjust to. "Are they physically able to take care of me?" The Doctor and mum shared an amused look and then, much to my surprise, started to laugh. "Hey? What is it?"

"You'll see." Mum winked. She got up with my plate and hers and went to the sink. The Doctor joined her. I took one look towards them and escaped back to my room. According to the sun, it looked like it was maybe eleven thirty in the morning. I turned towards the mirror and inspected myself. I cocked my head to the side. My hair gracefully fell in a waterfall of red. I looked very pretty. I smiled, realizing that I could live with this new body. I also, after much thought, realized I could live with high school. It would be an experience and probably good for me. It would cause me to fend for myself in a social situation, but still have adults to come back to at the end of the day.

There was a knock on my door.

"Yeah?"

"Can I come in?" The Doctor's voice was slightly muffled by the door.

"Of course." I sat on my bed as the Doctor entered. "What's up?" He sat down next to me and ruffled my hair.

"Brilliant, you are." He grinned at me.

"I guess I am. Yeah." I smiled back at him.

"You'll be amazing," he grabbed my hand and squeezed it. "So, what have you decided about school?"

"I could deal with it," I squeezed his hand back. "It won't be as good as Barcelona, but then again, nothing can beat dogs with no noses." We both laughed. "Promise me you'll visit? Now that I know you're real, you have to come back."

"Of course I'll come back, I always come back." We got up and he embraced me. It was a long hug and neither one of us wanted it to end, but it had to. Once we parted, he put my face in his hands. "I don't believe in many things, but I believe in you." He kissed my forehead. "Goodbye Cassie." With that he turned away from me and left my room and that was that. I didn't cry, not really. I was sad because I knew it would be a while till I saw him again. The Doctor, my dad. It was all still so unreal to me. Then mum came into me room and told me to pack. She told me that the house I would be living in would not be nearly as large as this one and I told her I was fine with that.

"We'll need to get you new clothing now that you've regenerated," mum observed. "So don't pack any clothing. I'll have my mum take you shopping once you get settled."

The only thing I packed was my book of fairy tales.

**Only the epilogue left. Please review and tell me what you think.**


	11. Epilogue

**I apologize for how lat this is, but I hope you enjoy it nonetheless.**

…

I found myself in a garden behind a house. There were lanterns all around, however they weren't lit. Of course not, it was the middle of the day. Although greenery surrounded us, I could tell we had arrived in an urban area. Mum's hand, which moments ago had been interlocked with mine, was now back at her side.

"Wait here for a bit, Cassie dear," she waited for me to acknowledge what she had said. She proceeded to turn towards the house and then walked past the screen door and into the house. Curiously, a couple seconds later I snuck up to the door.

"I need a favour," I could hear mum say to someone. I pressed my ear against the screen.

"What's wrong? Does it have to do with the Doctor? Is he in trouble?" The voice that responded belonged to a woman, but not the kind I had been expecting. First off, the voice had the harsh edge of someone Scottish, but that really got me was how young she sounded. Really young. I'm talking twenties. So, if mum wasn't talking to my grandparents, then who was she talking to? I couldn't help, but to recall all the times my mother had lied to me, had told me things to appease me and then just ended up not having to deal with the aftermath. I resisted the impulse to barge in on them. _Listen!_ I told myself.

"Spoilers," I heard mum tease.

"Oi! Still that?" The woman and mum began to laugh. "So what's this favour of yours?"

"You still have that spare bedroom?"

"Yeah," the woman snorted. "But no way in hell I'm letting you and the Doctor in there alone." More laughter.

"No, I have someone with me. I was wondering if she could stay with you for a bit."

"Someone? Someone who?" I could hear the skepticism dripping from the stranger's voice.

"She's in the garden. Is father dear home? He should meet her, too." I could hear them get up.

"He's out, just me." and them in a mumble: "But is it a friend? You don't have friends."

"Just come and see for yourself." It was then that I realized that they were heading back towards the garden, back towards me. I scampered to the little table and settled in a chair right as the screen door slid open. I innocently looked up and froze. I had seen that woman before. Those features on her face, that red hair, the spray of freckles, I had seen all of that in the mirror. She looked like me, this new me, exactly. That is except her eyes, they were hazel, not the cold grey of mine.

Speaking of her eyes, they widened. She turned her head to mum, back at me, back at mum.

"I'm going to get some wine, excuse me." She turned her back towards me and walked back inside.

"Mum, what the bloody hell is going on?" Mum had a wicked smirk on her face.

"Well, Cas, that was your grandmother."

"But she's—"

"Not small and wrinkly, I know," mum winked, but I just gaped at her. She opened her mouth as if to say more, but I shook my head and smiled weakly.

"Wibbly wobbly timey wimey." I quoted the Doctor.

"Yes," mum laughed. "Very."

"So I'm going to be living here?" I raised one of my eyebrows, a skill this new body allowed me to do. "With her?"

"If I play my cards right and, don't worry, I usually do." The screen doors opened once more and the woman – my twenty something year old grandmother – returned, an entire bottle of wine in hand.

"You can't overlap time streams, yeah?" This was directed at mum, although she was staring at me. She glanced at mum, who nodded, and then her eyes fixed themselves back at me. "So I'm assuming you're not me." This time she was speaking to me.

"Definitely not."

"Well then," she plopped down in the chair next to me. "I'm Amy." She took a sip out of the bottle.

"Cassie," I managed to say.

"If you don't mind me asking, Cassie, who are you?" I opened my mouth to respond, although I had no clue as to what to say. Thankfully mum responded for me.

"Mother dear, you have to promise me you will not freak out over what I'm about to say."

"I've travelled through time with the Doctor and have been witness to many of the deaths of my husband. Plus I know you, River. Nothing can freak me out."

"Alright then. Well, Amy," I noticed that mum's voice had become softer. "This is Cassie. Her full name is Cassandra Amelia Song and she's your granddaughter." I waited for a response. Nothing happened. Amy seemed frozen in her seat. Some internal battle could be raging inside of her, but I couldn't see that. Mum walked to Amy and gently put a hand on Amy's shoulder.

"Are you alright?"

"Oh yeah," Amy nodded. "I'm fine."

"Are you sure, Amy?"

"Yeah, yeah. Just a twenty four year old grandmother, nothing wrong with that at all." Amy shook her head and looked up at me. "Sorry, that was rude. Just a bit of shock. And of course you're welcome to stay with Rory and me." She smiled, it was warm and welcoming. I returned the favour.

"A shock for you? I expected you to be a shriveled up prune with no teeth."

"Oi!" Amy mockingly shoved my arm, grinning at me. "Young people these days. When I was your age we respected our elders." She then laughed. It was the kind of laugh that seemed to brighten her entire face. I wondered if I now laughed like that. "Right then, I'll get your bed ready, yeah?" She stood up and before going back inside gave me a quick wink.

"Can't my life ever be normal?"I asked mum, who had replaced Amy in the seat to my side.

"Normal is ever so dull. This way is much better. Besides, you aren't normal, far from it. Why should your life be?" I stuck out my tongue, but a smirk had made its way to my lips. I definitely was not normal. But quickly my smirk changed into a sad smile.

"I guess that means we'll never be a proper family. You. me, and the Doctor. We'll never have that life."

Mum gave out a soft, melancholy laugh that broke my heart. "I wish I could say that you're wrong. There is nothing in this universe that I want more. That impossible man, he's the most amazing man in all of space and in all of bloody time. I need you to understand that. It's just that he can't have that life."

"And neither can you," I said what she couldn't, finishing her thought.

"Neither can I," mum confirmed. I knew this and it no longer hurt me the way I had expected it too. "That doesn't mean you aren't loved, Cas. You are loved. So, so loved."

"But it doesn't stop people from leaving me," the words flew out. It wasn't out of spite or sadness, but the truth. Whenever I had someone, they left. Mum, the Doctor, now mum again. Mum looked odd for a second. She looked hurt, but then her eyes grew furious. She leaned forward so close that I could hear her steady breathing and feel it on my face. Her eyes became locked into mine.

"You are never alone. No matter how lonely you feel or how sad you are, you are never ever alone. I'm sorry if you've ever felt like that, but now I'm going to make up to that. You will always have a home no matter where you are. This universe, it's yours. Being a timelord, you have to find company in everything because there is nothing as constant as you. You just need to know that no matter what time period you are in, no matter where in space you are, there is no such thing as alone. Not for you, never." She kissed my forehead and then stood up. "I'm going to tell Amy all of the logistics of you staying here. Come if you like."

"I'll be there in a minute," my voice was small and thick. It felt as though my throat was filled with peanut butter.

"Alright."

I waited until she was safe inside. I pulled my knees to my chest and hugged my legs close to me. How could my mother possibly say that I was never alone? How could she know? I thought of her leaving and I began to cry. Maybe it was out of sadness, but more likely it was due to the exhaustion of the day. That morning I had gotten a glimpse of a life I could never have: breakfast with mum and dad. But then I recalled Amy's kind face, heard her laugh. I imagined a life that I would be having. Amy and her husband acting as guardians and a home filled with love and company. I rubbed my eyes and calmed my breathing. I stood up and realized how tired I was.

The inside of the house was as quaint and adorable as the garden. It looked lived in, but not a mess, nothing like my previous residence. The sink had dishes in them and there were piles of papers on the dining room table. I smiled at the normality of it all. Something caught my eye. I went to the refrigerator; stuck with magnets were many drawing that seemed to have been done by a child. Though the drawings lacked continuity with reality, I could make out a man in all of them, an impossible man. I smiled. This home would definitely do.

"Oi! Cassie!" Amy's voice startled me.

"Coming!" I responded, taking one last look at the pictures of the Doctor, I ran to Amy's voice. I had done an awful lot of running in my life, but this time felt different. For the first time in ages I was running to, not away. It felt fantastic.

…

**Please tell me what you thought of this last bit or of the entire story. I love feedback. Also thank you all so much for your support. 3**


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